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 The Spiritual Journey: Divine Discontent 
 

This very power of desire within your souls imprints the nature of GodÑwhich is LoveÑupon your lives. (Capsanis 1992)

There is a natural impetus in human nature that moves us toward the sanctification of our desires, for we are always hungry to merge with the divine. And this urge is so strong because we are so human!

It is through this constant "divine discontent," this feeling of always seeking a greater identity, that you will eventually evolve into a replica of your Ideal.

I am awed by the truth of this statement as it comes onto my computer! It's hard to understand how we got so far out of touch with our compelling and vibrant nature. And then, to define it as bad. To passionately "live in God and let God live in us," (Capsanis 1992) then, is our highest goal. For in this way, God's nature of Love and Desire moves toward us, and is absorbed by us. And since we are made in His image, we actually become this desire and love our own divinity as well as our humanness we "take on God-nature."

The bottom line for most of us is this: During those times we are moving in a forward and higher direction, we are quite pleased with ourselves. Life seems worth living, even during the worst times. In fact, often during the hard timesÑfor during times of personal crisis, our energies become intense and imbued with meaning. When we experience this "high," we are living in God and God is living in us. We are for that time, at least, in ecstasy. We find a deep meaning and purpose to this existence, almost the erotic gratification that accompanies any fulfilling affair of the heart. And if we somehow lose it, our ecstasy turns into the agony of despair.

Religious agony/ecstasy has been evident throughout the ages and was deeply honored in the early Christian church. The ancient Greek Orthodox Church, for instance, believed that God looks out through our eyes. In ancient times, humans were seen as divine. And for these early Christians, learning to embody variations on the theme of Life and Love was the equivalent of doing God's will. It is possible that even through the Christian religious life, we were never intended to externalize some "Old Man in the Sky" as our ultimate authority, but instead, we were meant to act creatively and morally under our own steam. In fact, morality to these early Christians was the alignment of a philosophy of life with rapturous living. This made for goodness in human nature.

But always, ecstatic extremes have been feared because they put us in a high energy state too exotic to contain. Today, in fact, we seem to have lost this sanctification of our human desires almost completely, seeing them as immoral. We run from what we truly crave to avoid becoming obsessed. Perhaps we are afraid we might find that, once experienced, we could not live without it.

Perhaps here lies the real cause of our neurotic pain and all the disorderly addictions that carry us to the extremes of our passionate nature: We are afraid to claim what gives us the most pleasure in life and go for it. Instead, we seek substitutes for God. And still we do not find fulfillment. You might find it interesting to stop right now and reflect on what it is you truly want, in your deepest heart of hearts, and see if you are moving toward it. Or is it only a dream that, in resignation and disbelief, you've decided will never come true.

We both fear and adore our passions and the delicious fruits of this earthly existence. This sensual/emotional feeling level of life is where many people experience the deepest splits, imbalances, and confusions. All these unintegrated desires and misunderstandings keep us divided within. Ultimately they keep us from becoming unified with the Inner Beloved, our Divine Self. For we dare not dream that a True Love so wonderful could live right inside our own skin.

(Excerpted from Embodying Spirit: Coming Alive with Meaning and Purpose ISBN: 0062552783)
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